The Christmas That Never Ends!

After about 5 hours of sleep (I had another 3am nighter) I woke up and my legs killed! I didn’t think I did THAT much walking and hiking yesterday at the Temples..but my legs tell me otherwise! I am so glad I was not doing another day of Temples because my legs would NOT have been able to handle it!

I have decided that any experience is different for everyone, so there will be no more SHOULDS for me. I am here because God put me here and instead of worrying if I am doing enough, if I am doing what’s right, if I am gaining enough from the experience, I am going to work on just “being”.

I dropped off my laundry (I seem to be flying through my clothes) and made my way to the Home of Joy. I saw a LOT of shoes outside so I was ready for a big crowd! And I found one! I ALSO found Santa Claus! It is like the Christmas that never ends! I found out the group was from Singapore and have been here since Christmas. They are affiliated with the Catholic Church so have been “touring” with them and seeing other villages. The man I spoke with said there were 37 of them, ranging from 14 to 96! The 96 year old woman was adorable! They were singing Christmas songs and hanging out with the kids. I gave “Santa” credit as I cannot imagine how hot it must have been in his suit!

The man also told me about a woman from Colorado so I went over to introduce myself. Jenny is in her late 50’s and is traveling all over Southeast Asia writing a book about being a solo female traveler. I was SO intrigued (I made sure to give her my email). She has been a widow for 13 years and has 3 daughters. She spends a lot of time traveling so she decided to write a book! I asked her lots of questions about what she does, how she does it and she said really she just shows up somewhere. She starts walking around and finds people very helpful (in Temples and Churches etc.) and takes it from there! She spends a lot of time teaching English to kids and meeting with the locals. I found her so interesting and I really enjoyed listening to her stories.

Sister Nazarene came over and asked me if I was staying for the week. I said I was and she asked if I could teach English to Maria, the woman who brought me the list of words last week. UGH! Obviously I had to say yes but inside I was dying. I know I have written about how guilty I feel for not wanting to teach English. The one thing I really enjoyed about Home of Joy was that I could just BE with the kids and I didn’t have to teach. Now, I will be spending my mornings teaching English to Maria and my afternoons teaching English at ODA. As awful as I feel for saying this..I am actually sort of bummed. Granted the kids wear me out, but I love hanging out with them in the morning. I think I am a little worn out (in general) but also worn out of always being asked to teach English, practice English, etc. I am trying to stay positive! I came here with an open mind and an open heart so God could put me where I am needed. And I will do my best to teach English with a smile, but I really just don’t enjoy it at all and will miss my time with the kids. I am also trying to remind myself I am only here for another week. I guess I just feel like ALL I have done for the past couple of months is teach English. When people see me they just FLOCK to learn English. I admire that and admire their willingness to learn but it’s just not something I am comfortable doing. I would really appreciate your continued prayers and support especially during this week.

I think if I was staying for more than another week I might ask to go somewhere else rather than the Home of Joy. I think because they are run by the Catholic Church there isn’t much need. Having the church behind them makes a HUGE difference. I also think they have a TON of volunteers and financial support (because of the church). I have been looking to see if there are ways I could contribute financially..but every couple of days there are groups of volunteers coming in with supplies and money etc. I am enjoying my time there but part of me feels my time and effort could be of better use elsewhere.

I left Home of Joy and road my bike back to homestay and it was HOT! I had PB&J and enjoyed a little downtime before heading into town. My man wasn’t sitting on his motorbike in front of his house, but I knew around the corner there would be a group of them waiting! However, I hadn’t gotten that far before one was driving past and asked me. I hopped on and said, “Blue Pumkpkin, Old Market” and it was OBVIOUS he had no clue. Most of the time I don’t have to help THAT much with getting into town..but I think the only English word this guy knew was, “Motorbike?” Luckily I feel pretty comfortable with directions so when he started going down this road I had never seen before I figured I could get us there. At one point I wanted him to go right at the lights and he just pulled over and stopped! Oh what a hassle to get into town!

As I walked up to the Blue Pumpkin I saw Sokmaly, the very outgoing girl and another girl I couldn’t remember (I soon realized she was the dancing teacher). I was sort of confused why there were two of them there to pick me up and then I realized that meant THREE of us had to ride a motorbike. Now these motorbikes were made for two..maybe THREE people if you are little..but it was NOT made for two girls and a Grady butt (Mom and Auntie Kathy you KNOW what I am talking about!) I spent the entire ride PRAYING I wouldn’t slip off as my butt was literally hanging off the edge.

The English lesson started as we left with them asking what things were in English, etc. I think they must be used to talking with the wind but I find it SO difficult and am constantly saying, “What? Huh? I can’t hear you!”

We arrived at ODA and again the group was small (which I like..I think). I went over to talk to Leng (the head guy) because I had some questions etc. but he was very weird and kind of rude. He just kind of brushed me off and said, “Yeah you teach and we talk later”. I am hoping he was just in a bad mood or something. There were six people in class today since the other half was at school! Bo is the older girl who I think is there to teach dancing. Her English is pretty good..except I can’t tell if she is 17 or 23..but I think 23 like me! Sokmaly is 17 (I think) and she talks a lot and gets very involved. Pharly is a cute little girl who is 10 and doesn’t say much. Tea is my FAVORITE! I think he is 7 or 8 (they don’t seem to know their ages) and he is just the CUTEST little thing. Lot and Pek are my two “boys” and Pek actually speaks English well and always wins when we have games.

I started off with the letters and numbers game since they still have trouble with letters. I soon realized I was VERY tired. I still don’t think I am used to the heat and I find it hard to be teaching in the afternoon when it is so hot. I am always talking and standing so I also find I get more tired that way. We continued on to introductions. We didn’t spend much time on that and I just had them say a couple of things out loud. I have NO idea if I am expected to teach for 2 hours straight but there is NO way I can do that when I don’t have a clue what to do (the kids get tired as well). I really wanted to stop at that point but I continued on to fruits. I went over the names and then had them each be a fruit. When I said their fruit they had to stand up! Then I had them partner up and one of the partners would come up to me. I would whisper the name of a fruit and they had to go back and tell their partner. Then, their partner had to find the fruit in the book and show me. To finish the day, I had one person stand outside the group and play “telephone” and then the last person had to say what they had heard to the person outside of the group and that person had to show everyone the picture in the book.

I think I am finding that I am a bit drained. I think my body is tired (I can’t seem to shake this cold..I feel like I can never sleep enough and just the wear and tear of travel) and my mind and heart are tired if that makes ANY sense. I find the traveling alone to be tiring..the always having to be on guard..learning a new place, area, language, customs, etc. I also find that I am “exhausted” by seeing such poverty and sadness. I guess by that I mean it gets exhausting seeing how others live, with disabilities or with a lack of resources. I am NOT in the least bit complaining. I love every second I spend helping people, but I guess what I am saying is I am really looking forward to next week with my mom and Lorna. I feel physically and mentally drained and I think it will be good for me to rejuvenated before volunteering in Thailand. I am hoping after my little break I can come back refreshed!

Leng had been gone for awhile..but luckily a few of the kids could speak enough English that I didn’t feel completely abandoned. One of the boys who had driven me once showed up and I finally was able to understand he could bring me back. I actually enjoy the boys more than the girls (I know that sounds bad..) but the girls are very giddy and giggly but I feel like I can “hang” more with the boys. They were asking me if I could sing and dance (I told them they didn’t wanna hear me sing or see me dance) but that I would charge my iPod so we could listen to some music tomorrow. I also asked if I could bring them some fruit (they were very excited) so Veasnu (I THINK that’s my “sometimes” drivers’ name) said tomorrow he could pick me up and bring me to a market! Hopefully that goes smoothly!

I came back to the homestay to drop off my stuff and get my laptop to head downtown. My man next door was waiting and luckily I don’t have to say too much since he now knows where I go. I made myself comfortable at the Blue Pumpkin and I somehow managed to pass the time uploading photos, answering emails, etc. I then made my way to a pizza place for dinner. I was exhausted, hot and cranky and just wanted something quick as I still had to get my laundry and get back.

I found a tuk-tuk, showed him where I needed to go, and waited for the “Oh so far..$3!” The novelty of bargaining has DEFINITELY worn off as I now reply, “$2” and start walking away. They don’t waste ANY time and yell ok as I hop in.

I find trying to get home every night exhausting. The tuk-tuk drivers want to charge more because it’s so far away (like I need to be reminded I am in the middle of nowhere) and since they never know where they are going I can’t really relax because I need to make sure we are heading in the right direction!

I did manage to get my laundry AND get home for $2 without getting lost!

Hugs and kisses from Christmas part two!